Friday, January 30, 2009

Rick Ross Is A Funny Dude

Most overweight boss that you've seen thus far.

Here at Pay Tray me and my two readers are way too smart to care about things like the Rick Ross/50 beef (though I've got to say, maybe 50 should just retire, this is embarrassing), but I do have to put out this bizarre interview Officer Ricky gave on the subject. Along with that video-of-the-year Wayne/Couric preview ("I'm a gangsta. Gangstas don't axe questions"), I think this really makes the case that gangsta rap has become an insane baroque parody of himself. Listen to what Rick has to say when he's asked why he dissed 50:

Rick: Well really, it's nothing that could be really personal, you understand? It's like a UFO, you understand? He was a nigga that I had actually seen at the BET Awards, and I had different intentions for him. [Different intentions?] When I went backstage and I bumped into him, he made an expression on his face that disappointed me, being a real nigga. So I gave him a pass, you know what I'm sayin, and we just kept it movin, but at the same token, it was time to let niggas know what the real was.

Interviewer (baffled): So, it's all because of an expression... on his face??? Like what kind of expression?

Rick: Hey, it's deeper than rap, baby! It's deeper than rap. But that's - you know - that was just one of the things that, that, that, that - when I finally had the opportunity to bump into him, I actually had intended on having words with him. But he kinda disappointed me, so I kept it movin, you know what I'm sayin, but it's all love, it's all love, you know.

Let me put it this way, if I didn't know better, I would think that Rick Ross was a crazy white performance artist from the suburbs in a fat suit. Basically it sounds like Rick was all excited to "finally have the opportunity to bump into"/hit on his idol and 50 made a mean face and hurt his feelings. The funny thing about the interview is how he attempts to cloak this ridiculously gay episode in cliche gangstaisms, i.e. "it's deeper than rap," "he made an expression...that disappointed me, being a real nigga," "I kept it movin," etc. It's like, yeah, I'm admitting to being stung because a guy gave me a nasty look, but hey, at least I kept it movin! He owed me respect because I'm a real nigga! This shit is deeper than rap! Then later he's asked why he had his baby's mother's car repossessed and he offers up this gem:

Really, really, that's just, like, we telling her it's time for her to go get a better job, I got nothing but love for you baby but it's time for you to be independent, but really, she ain't got nowhere else to turn. So I'm basically managing her too. I'm her manager. I'm sending her looking for book deals. Since G-Unit ain't putting out records maybe you could get her a book deal or somethin. He [50] bought his baby mama [inaudible], I'm gonna to share mine. I'm a hustler for real. I'm gonna take the money, she gonna bring me back half. It's the BOSS.

First of all, what is his baby momma going to write a book about? The Life and Times of Rick Ross's Baby Mama? Second, note how he tries to turn the squalid details of his personal life into evidence of his BOSSness and hustler for REALness.

1 comment:

Badmon3333 said...

Wow. That cover is like the "Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood" version of a Tyler Perry sitcom.

"This is how you answer the door in MY neighborhood, kids... 'WHO IS IT?!?'"